The Good, The Bad, and The Silly

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The Good:

At least one person from the Republican Party is saying something along the lines of, “Immigrants aren’t a problem, they’re people.” Although, as Tomas Summers Sandoval explains in this article, Powell’s still framing it as an “us vs. them (the ones who do the dirty work for us real Americans)” kind of question.

Florida points out the obvious: gays can be parents, too.

What a domestic violence PSA should look like. (It is upsetting to watch, btw.)

Supposedly an immigration bill is getting introduced soon, and supposedly it is LGBT inclusive and brings back the DREAM Act (most recently shut down by the despicable DADT repeal shutdown).

The Bad:

So FBI agents are cheating on the test about how to pursue and question terrorists and home and abroad — is it any wonder they’re doing it wrong?

And another government branch, the military, is on trial for performing terrible acts against Afghanis — wonder why this isn’t receiving the same attention Abu Grahib did, if there are images?

No, really, the world as we know it is ending, and it really is our fault.

A clear, terrifying view of why it is not ok to force Internet providers to give the government backdoor access — you will be monitored 24/7, and that is wrong. Think it’s ok as long as you have nothing to hide? That’s not a free society. And anyway, “something worth hiding” changes depending on what government is in charge.

Another study shows that teaching kids to be colorblind instead of to value racial diversity just results in kids not recognizing racism when it’s spitting in their face. A University of Illinois study of college kids showed much the same thing.

The Silly:

The Oatmeal has, among other things, many hilarious, beautifully typeset explanations of basic grammar. Here’s the latest one.

What have you been reading this week?

Fall Favorites

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For the last couple of years, I’ve thrown a Fall Fest at my apartment. Friends would meet up to carve pumpkins, eat donuts, and drink cider. It was a low-key event, centered around a love of the changing seasons and all the tasty, tasty food that goes with it. This year, now that I’m in my new, smaller apartment, I won’t be able to host Fall Fest, but that doesn’t mean I’ll be giving up my celebratory traditions. There is a pumpkin-shaped candy dish, the rum and cider recipe is as good as ever, and caramel is waiting to be melted onto freshly picked apples. (The centrality of food is no mistake here — autumn is harvest time, after all.)

pumpkin carving

pumpking carving at Fall Fest '08

Then there’s the whole non-food element to the season, that melancholy air that swirls in with those first few crisp days. Fall can bring you down if you’re not careful, as everything around you literally dies and turns away for six months. But if you’re in the right mood, that melancholy is poignant and comforting, a reminder to breathe in the air more deeply and fold your loved ones into you more closely as the cold cuts closer. I know so many people who name autumn as their favorite season, and aside from the relief from sweltering summer, the main reason seems to be that sense of change in the air, the knowledge that everything around us is burrowing under while we start a school year, or start a new project, or rekindle a friendship. Autumn is the perfect encapsulation of the cyclical nature of, well, nature, and also of we humans — everything is changing, decomposing, layering, rebuilding, renewing. The days grow darker and the skies cloud over, but that’s a (deliciously burnt leaves) smokescreen — fall smells crisper and tastes sharper because we are most aware of who we are in these shortening days, and we are alive.

yellow and red leaves on an autumn day

one of my fall favorites

With all that in mind, what are your favorite parts of the season? What longstanding traditions do you cherish? What do you dislike about it? See you in the comments!

UPDATE: I didn’t even realize it as I wrote this, but I wrote like this exact post last November. Oh well, it’s still true.

New Centerstage Review Up

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I promised you a GBS and then callously broke that promise. Apologies, friends, but will you forgive me if I tell you it was because I was eating duck fat fries at Hot Doug’s? No? Yeah, didn’t think so. To make up for it, here’s where you can see my latest Centerstage review, and tomorrow morning you’ll have a brand-new post.

The most difficult thing about adapting Emily Bronte’s “Wuthering Heights” is convincing the audience to empathize with characters who are all totally despicable. Christina Calvit’s adaptation for Lifeline Theatre nimbly sidesteps this problem by posing a question in narrator Nelly’s mouth in the play’s framing scenes: How are we to make sense of these people and what they have done to one another? Is it even possible to do so?…

Read the rest of the review here.

No Post Today

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Sorry, folks. Moving has taken up all my brainspace. But do come back on Friday — I’m still mostly keeping up on the news, so there will be a The Good, The Bad, and The Silly. Have a great week!

Here, dance with this elephant while I’m gone:

The Good, The Bad, and The Silly

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The Good:

Correct. (And good lord, why is Paglia still getting published?)

I wish I’d seen this published more widely. We need to hear Obama taking more stands like this, especially against Islamophobia. (Via.)

Lifesaving water missions aren’t a crime. No More Deaths (No Más Muertes) does incredibly important humanitarian aid work on the US-Mexico border in Arizona, and they’ve just won a small victory as one of their members won his appeal of a trumped-up littering conviction.

The Bad:

Okay, I know I get a lot of my bad news from Shakesville, but they really do a great job of pointing out and breaking down a lot of what’s going on around the country. Lately, the corporate takeover of America’s vote and the carte blanche on torture given to the CIA have really upset me.

These are an old pair of posts, but mind-boggling in what they reveal about the Republican party. I know and love many Republicans, but every time I see things like this, I wonder how they can vote for a party that officially wants to hurt so many people. I wonder if they still think of the party whose official platform once looked like this?

A major literary magazine in India publishes vile comments from the vice-chancellor of a prestigious university calling women writers whores.  (Via.)

Yep, actually, “redistribution of wealth” sounds about right nowadays.

The Silly:

Hark! a vagrant is a delightful cartoon about history and literature and silliness. In this one, apparently the editor never heard the maxim “show, don’t tell.”

I love, love www.passiveaggressivenotes.com — straightforwardly!

Okay, what have you been reading this week?

A Home of One’s Own

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What asshole left those dishes in the sink for the past three days? Oh right, it was me. And whose clothes are strewn all about the place? Me again. And the layer of dust an inch thick — don’t tell me, it was that jerk me again. Dearest fellow travelers, I can’t begin to tell you how excited I am that in just a few short weeks, I will once again have these non-woes.

I’ve always enjoyed living on my own, and did so for a couple years after college, but I can live with others. I was a miserable roommate freshman year, but by the time I was studying in Rome junior year, I had shaped up into a more considerate person (with egregious exceptions, I’m sure). When I moved to Chicago, I found two roommates looking for a third on Craigslist, and we quickly settled into a happy living situation.

That was three years ago, and since then I’ve had eight roommates total rotate through the same apartment. I became close friends with three of them, dire enemies with one, resentful acquaintances with two, and friendly Facebook friends with the rest. I discovered all the reasons people love living with others: someone to talk to when you come home from work, someone to share dinner with, someone to split the utility bills with. I’ve entertained couch surfers with roommates and thrown blowout parties with roommates. I went to Jamal’s improv show and to the movies with Mike. Marina made me a hedgehog cake from scratch for my birthday and Katherine gave me a book with an inscription that made me cry when she moved away. After they moved out, I visited Julie in Pasadena and Marina in Utrecht.

So you see, I have thoroughly enjoyed many aspects of living with others, and I’ve been pretty lucky in finding strangers on Craigslist who turn into friends. But the roommates who didn’t work out so well — well, they’re reason enough to take up residence in a hermitage. I’m done covering other people’s rent in order to avoid eviction, discovering multiple items stolen from my room and common rooms, and locking myself away from overnight guests high on drugs I couldn’t even name. There are downsides to not knowing who you’re shacking up with, although as I always point out to concerned relatives, living with someone is also the easiest way to lose a once-good friend after innumerable fights over boyfriends who never leave the apartment, bills gone unpaid, and the ever-present dishes/cleaning situation. You take a risk however you go about it.

And thus I’m saying farewell to my beloved apartment (so beloved that Marina and I named it Angie) and moving across the alley to a one bedroom. It’ll cost much more, it’s three flights up instead of ground floor, and there’s no porch, but in exchange I get to be the sole ruler of my domain, and nothing matches the sweetness of that.

Have you all seen this video that’s been making the rounds, “How to Be Alone“? Andrea Dorfman recorded a video set to Tanya Davis’s poem about not just making it through times when you’re on your own, but embracing, savoring, and enjoying the state of being alone. It’s a lovely video and I appreciate the sentiment, even if at this stage in my life I don’t need the advice because I’m actively living it.

I’m sure there will be a time in the future when I won’t mind sharing my permanent living space, and of course couch surfing my way around the world is a whole separate issue of nomadic living, but for now I’m perfectly content to set up a new apartment and make it my own.

How about you? What living situation works best for you? What roommate horror stories or heartwarming tales do you have?

I will miss Angie, though. Lucky the Stones wrote a song just for us. Ain’t it time we said goodbye, indeed:

The Good, The Bad, and The Silly

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Some of these are from last week, since I meant to post a GBS on Friday but flew to Boston instead. Like ya do. Enjoy, and as ever, put your own links in comments!

The Good

Daley has decided to step down as mayor of Chicago. I’m joining the 65% of Chicagoans who think this is either a good move or one that won’t make a difference — he’s done some really awful things while in office, but the Chicago political system is so rife with corruption that I can’t see his successor being much of an improvement. [EDIT: Bad word choice. He’s not stepping down, he’s simply not running again come the next election.]

Peter and Paul say hell no to the National Organization for Marriage using the Peter, Paul and Mary version of “This Land is Your Land” at NOM rallies. There’s a long history of political candidates pissing off musicians by using their songs without permission, but my favorites are when the musicians respond not just to copyright violation but to their seeming endorsement of a candidate they find reprehensible — like Springsteen telling Reagan “Born in the U.S.A.” wasn’t exactly a celebratory song, or Heart telling Sarah Palin she ain’t no “Barracuda.”

The Ginsburgs sound like they were a fantastic couple, and Ruth is such a winner. (Via.)

The Bad

This is terrifying news from June that I just read about. As post author Problem Chylde says, “The line between a conscientious dissenter and a terrorist is becoming blurrier, and citizens of all nations are treading a fine line between acting under a moral imperative and obeying the law. What is the use of having freedoms one cannot exercise?”

Traister and Holmes lay it out for us: It’s a disgrace that Sarah Palin is heralded as the face of feminism in politics. Where is that face for the Democrats?

The Silly

“If Historical Events Had Facebook Statuses“… apparently it’d all still be 15-year-old boys. Yikes! But still funny.

Two words: Hipster dinosaurs (thanks to Mlle. O’Leary for the tip)

New Centerstage Review Up

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I’m just home from Boston, and I’m sure I’ll be telling you more about that later, but for now, enjoy my latest review of a Chicago theatrical event:

Brian Friel’s “Lovers” consists of two unrelated acts, one labeled “Winners” and one labeled “Losers.” It’s a bittersweet play, celebrating the intense connection couples feel while also lamenting the complications and compromises that inevitably pull them farther apart. …

Read the rest here. I should also say that they all talked in Irish accents, and stayed remarkably consistent throughout, which is pretty impressive.

Hope you had a good Labor Day weekend!

The Least Stinky Fish: The Top 5 Ways to Be a Great Guest

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Benjamin Franklin, founding father, scientist, author, diplomat, and turkey advocate, once said, “Fish and visitors stink after three days.” As usual, he gets it exactly right with this pithy pull quote. Whether you’re visiting friends or family, after three days of living in close quarters, sharing every meal, waiting impatiently for the bathroom, staying up later than usual, and all while trying to maintain your friendship, it’s very easy for the visit to feel less like a welcome break and more of a drag on both of you.

I’m stretching this principle to its breaking point this weekend, as I’m staying three full days and four nights with my friend Mike in Boston. So how can I make sure that when I get on the airplane to head back home, both of us will be planning our next get together and not crossing each other’s names out of our address books? I’m sure you will not be surprised to find that I have a list, dearest fellow travelers, and I’m sharing it with you!

The Least Stinky Fish: The Top 5 Ways to Be a Great Guest

1. Set expectations ahead of time. This hearkens back to my advice on hosting couch surfers; if you both know what you’re getting into, you’ll both have a lot more fun. Don’t think that just because you’re family or friends with your hosts, you don’t need to set expectations — sometimes they’re the ones you most need to have these conversations with, to make sure you’re all on the same page and feelings don’t get hurt. For example, I wrote Mike last week to say how excited I was to visit, and to warn him that my knee and ankle injuries have resurfaced, with two unfortunate results: 1) I am now the least fashionable person ever, as I dress in bright white walking shoes no matter my outfit, and 2) I walk slower than a sloth on a lazy summer day. Mike was sorry to hear about my injury, of course, and no doubt he will regret being seen with me and the Great White Sneakers, but he was happy to know this vital piece of information enough ahead of time to reconsider how we should get to the various places we’re going.

2. No matter how short the trip, set aside some down time. Don’t wait until you’re halfway through your second marathon day of museums, hikes, street food, wacky local mode of transportation, tourist attractions, and shopping to realize you need to sitdownrighthisinstantoryouwillpassout — plan for it. Sure, your schedule will be different than when you’re at home, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t need time to rest when you’re away, same as you do at home. (Younger folks than I, I promise this is not an old person talking, just someone who knows what traveling while exhausted feels like — not good.) You don’t always have to crash back at the house, either; find a nice park and take a nap or stake out a corner of a local café to re-energize.

3. Pick up the tab. Not on everything, mind you, but it’s a great reciprocal gesture to pick up the tab somewhere along the way. Don’t bankrupt yourself, but do what you can, whether that’s a whole meal, or a round of drinks, or even an ice cream cone. Of course your loved one is happy to see you, but they are putting aside their normal life and opening up their home in order to do that, so show them your appreciation by paying for some food or drink during your visit.

4. Research where you’re going, even just a little. Trips based on visiting friends or family are inherently different from trips based on visiting new places; your purpose is different, so the way you prepare and the way you spend your time while there is different. I’m not going to be doing a Great Sites of Boston tour this weekend — I’ll be doing a Hang Out in Parks and Have Drinks tour with Mike. But that doesn’t mean I can’t see some of this city. So I’m checking out a guidebook from the library, I’ve poked around on some websites, and I’ve asked Mike what he might want to sightsee. So far we are going to the Mapparium and taking a swan boat ride.

5. Plan for some solo time. This is sort of similar to #2, but it’s specifically designed to separate you from your host for at least a couple hours. One of the stinkiest things about visitors, I suspect Mr. Franklin would agree, is their tendency to stick to your side for the duration of their visit. Nothing smells good when it’s been that close to you for that long. You’ll both enjoy your visit a lot more if you set aside some time to do your own thing — write some postcards, buy some souvenirs, go to that one tourist attraction your host can’t bear to visit one more time. This gives your host time to tend to their daily lives and needs as well, and the end result is that you appreciate each other all the more when you are hanging out.

So voila! Those are the top five ways to plan a trip to a friend’s or family member’s house so that not only do you have a great time, but your host does too — and best of all, you get invited back.

The Good, The Bad, and The Silly

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The Good:

That’s right, Alaska, you use conservatives’ logic (and word choice) against them in the abortion debate! (Too bad it didn’t work and the damn parental notification law got passed anyway, but still. This is a thought for future fights.)

“Step Up. Step Back.” — the way for men to be feminist allies. (And also whites to be anti-racist allies, straights to be LGBT allies, etc.) (Via.)

The Bad:

Farmworkers are denied basic human rights, such as one day off a week, in New York and California. (Via.)

Bloomberg’s staff deliberately misconstrues the Seneca Indian Nation’s protest of his offensive shoot-em-up comments; whether the cigarettes should be taxed or not is not the issue when a high-profile government official states that another US government official should “get a shotgun” and say “the law of the land is this, and we’re going to enforce the law” to a tribe of people who have been at the wrong end of a shotgun courtesy of the US government too many times to count over hundreds of years. (Via.)

The Silly:

Possibly you’ve already seen this, but somebody decided to make a trailer for a fake movie — and I want to see the full-length. Jane Austen’s Fight Club! (Thanks to Sessily for the link.)

What have you seen/heard/read this week?

UPDATE: I just read this excellent piece by Timothy Egan, which breaks apart who is spreading what lies about Obama and why it matters. Wake the hell up, America; you’re better than this.